Chapter 2 - A Word from the Lord

In case you're thinking, "Chapter 2?? Where's Chapter 1??", here you go :)

~~~~~~~~
The fall of 2007 was just kind of a waiting time for us in this trying-to-get-pregnant process. Nothing was changing with my body, and we weren't sure what steps to take next. We were getting tired of just waiting for something to change, so I made another doctor's appointment for the first week of December.

The Sunday before my appointment, December 2, 2007, Tyson and I went to church. I mention that not because this is an unusual event, but because it was a significant day for us. Our preacher had been teaching an in-depth series on the work of the Holy Spirit, and lately had been talking about the gifts of the Spirit. (this was a really good series, by the way, and you can listen to any of the sermons here) That week, the topic happened to be prophecy. At the end of the sermon, he had members of the church stand up in front whom the Lord had used in the past to speak to others. Each of these people had a chance to say something to the congregation that they felt that the Lord wanted them to say.

One lady said words that I'll never forget hearing, "There is a woman here with a hormone imbalance, and the Lord wants to impart healing in your body." (*In case you are not a PCOS expert :) the cysts on the ovaries cause hormones to be made in incorrect amounts, not allowing eggs to develop.*) Now, I don't deny the fact that there very well could have been multiple women there with hormone imbalances. Even knowing that, I felt like God had reached down and personally touched me. I never wondered if that word was for me or not...I knew it was. And that one sentence would shape the way I thought about my situation for the next several months...it brought back some hope.

Before that day, I had not personally experienced prophecy that was meant for me. For Tyson and I both, prophecy was a pretty foreign concept, and I associated prophecy with predicting some future event. So, to feel that the Lord was speaking directly to me about something that was going on with me at that moment was pretty shocking. I can now look back and see how the Lord wanted us to hear those words to give us encouragement and strengthen our hearts that day, not just some day down the line.

Later that week, I went to my doctor's appointment. I'm not sure what I expected to learn at this appointment...I guess I was just looking for someone to tell me what to do next. I didn't really learn anything new about my condition, but that was the first time that the doctor suggested and prescribed a low level fertility drug, Clomid. Tyson was out of town on business at this point, so when he got home, we really talked this out. I still felt emotional about taking fertility drugs, especially after what we had just heard earlier that week.

Now, I will say that I do not think that taking fertility drugs is wrong. I just felt that it wasn't the right move for me at the time.

Once again, I felt conflicted. I wasn't sure whose word to trust...that lady in church or my doctor. I wanted some resolution to this problem, but the words I was hearing seemed like total opposites. So, not knowing what to do, we spent December, January, and February waiting on the Lord. Really, I was actually waiting on Him to fix me...to heal me completely.

...stay tuned for Chapter 3...